Disclaimer: The Magnificent Seven belong to MGM, Trilogy, etc.
Challenge: M7M Challenge for 10/11/04 – Use one or more of three different phrases from "Shrek 2"in the drabble.
Note: I decided to treat each quote separately. This set focuses on Donkey’s phrase “Oh, don’t feel bad, Shrek. Almost everybody who meets you wants to kill you.” Where the writer uses the name of one of the Seven instead of Shrek
Characters: Seven
Universe: Various
Rating: G
Feedback: to MMW

How Do You Do?
By MMW

Little Britches Star Trek – Nathan, Josiah

Nathan lifted his arm to defend himself once more. Buck and Chris had asked him to help the boys with their cultural studies assignment. The world they were to learn about was set up on the holodeck. Josiah had agreed to come along.

Having enough of this and every other attacker, Nathan finally asked, “Why does she want me dead?”

“Oh, don’t feel bad, Nathan. Almost everybody who meets you wants to kill you,” he said with a grin. “At least on this world. Doctors caused the collapse of their sporting industry – one of the cornerstones of their society.” Seeing his friend’s puzzled look, he explained. “They insisted the players heal completely.”

Little Britches ATF – Vin, JD, Ezra

“But why does everyone want to kill me,” Vin whined.

“Oh, don’t feel bad, Vin,” JD said, his voice bright and not terribly sympathetic. “Almost everybody who meets you wants to kill you.”

Ezra nearly choked as he listed to JD’s words. That was a horrible thing to say to someone. He was watching the boys for a few hours while Chris was at work and Buck was out with a lady. He hadn’t expected to face something like this. Stepping into the den, he was about to say something when he caught sight of the computer game.

“Why don’t you try again,” JD encouraged Vin, pushing the keyboard toward him.

Little Britches Dungeons and Dragons – Ezra, Buck

Ezra felt Buck pull him into the shelter of some dense brush and didn’t complain as the mercenary wrapped his cloak around him. Trying his best to be brave and hide the tears his fear had inspired, Ezra choked out the question uppermost in his mind. “Why do they all want to kill me?” he asked. “I didn’t even do anything.”

“Oh, don’t feel bad, Ezra. Almost everybody who meets you wants to kill you,” he teased. Seeing the ploy didn’t work, he drew the boy into a hug, looked into the green eyes and assured, “You’re a wizard and they’re afraid of magic. They would have done the same to any magic user.”

Old West – Ezra, Vin

Ezra sighed. Vin had been silent and morose since they’d been chased out of Serene just before a lynch mob. He knew what was bothering his friend. Sitting next to Vin, he and offered, “Oh, don’t feel bad, Vin. Almost everybody who meets you wants to kill you.” He received a smile.

Releasing a sigh Vin admitted, “I just don’t get it, Ez. A person isn’t their clothes or their hair or even their language. A person is what they do and how they treat others. It don’t make sense to judge on appearances.”

Rising, Ezra rested a hand on Vin’s shoulder. “Would the rest of the world saw as you do,” he whispered.

ATF – Josiah, Nathan

“I swear if I didn’t know better I would think they were trying to kill me,” Josiah said, letting out a soft groan as he sat. The seven had volunteered at a local youth club. Josiah and Nathan had ended up playing basketball with the teens. The game had been intense with Josiah constantly being bumped, elbowed, tripped and defended by three or more people every time he got the ball.

Nathan grinned at his friend. “Oh, don’t feel bad, Josiah. Almost everybody who meets you wants to kill you.” Seeing Josiah grin in return, Nathan slapped his friend’s leg and encouraged, “Come on, old timer. Let’s show these kids how it’s done.”

Lost Lambs AU – Chris, Buck

Chris winced as the bottle shattered against the wall. Had Buck not ducked, hit would have hit him squarely in the face. Knowing their badges wouldn’t help them here, Chris grabbed his friend by the shirt collar and half-dragged him out of the house. Making their way a fair distance from the building, Chris finally let Buck sit and rest. Seeing the downcast visage, he said, “Oh, don’t feel bad, Buck. Almost everybody who meets you wants to kill you at some point in time.”

Buck peered up at his old friend, unable to hide the grin that started forming. “Least I make a memorable impression,” he replied, accepting the hand up.

Haven – Vin, Chris

Chris was fuming and, while Vin understood, he still found it amusing. The two of them had set off to see Mary Travis and get some information. Chris, being his usual brusque self had instantly gotten under the other woman’s skin, causing her to lash out in frustration. Finally, Vin had to step in and chase Chris out, taking the time to soothe Mary. “Oh, don’t feel too bad, Chris,” he said, slapping Chris’ back. “Almost everybody who meets you wants to kill you.” Receiving a glare for his efforts, Vin shrugged an started walking. “I got what we need. And I’d recommend you send Mary a nice bouquet of forget-me-nots.”

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